Talk (Infidelity / Sliding doors / Along Came Polly)
Talk Introduction
Our topic tonight is: when is an affair, an affair?
We are going to start by watching a clip from Sliding doors
[Sliding Doors - Watch the first 12 minutes of the film...Helen
gets fired and ends up getting home early, catching Gerry in the act]
1 min – Helen gets sacked
4 min – Helen misses the train
6 min – Helen gets mugged
9 min – Gerry is getting it on with Lydia
11 min – Helen catches Gerry in the act
12 min – she shouts at him etc.
[Along Came Polly -
Watch the first 10 minutes of the film...Ruben and Lisa get married.
While they are on their honeymoon Lisa ends us sleeping with her scuba diver,
Claude!]
30 seconds - the title "along came problem appears"...
18 mins - Ruben catches Lisa at it with Claude
19 mins 38 secs - stop the film just after Ruben says "I'm going to kill
you"
Note for a third alternative, you could use a clip from Love Actually scene 2
The middle bit
How would you react if you were Helen / Ruben?
What feelings would be running through your head?
How would this effect Helen’s and Gerry’s / Ruben and Lisa's relations?
What are the consequences?
Betrayal / broken friendships / split loyalties / STI
The Bible deals with this kind of situation in several places
The most obvious been the seventh commandment: do not commit adultery
This was something that people were stoned to death for
What do you think about that?
Strictly speaking adultery refers to sleeping with somebody else’s husband
/ wife
But Jesus also said this
Matthew 5:28 NIV “But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already
committed adultery with her in his heart.”
In other words…thinking about doing stuff is just as bad as doing it
Why do you think the Bible says that?
Ephesians 5:3 (TM) also says “Don't allow love to turn into lust, setting off a downhill slide into
sexual promiscuity, filthy practices, or bullying greed.”
How do these verses affect our attitude towards people of the opposite
sex?
The way we talk…
Flirtation? What’s acceptable, what’s not?
Text messages
Cyber sex
The way we treat other peoples partners
In reality most of us struggle with these issues
How do we keep ourselves from going too far?
Don’t lead someone on…flirtation…etc.
Avoid situations been on your own / secret meetings with people of the
opposite sex
Keep your relationships in the open
If you are attracted to someone and you know it, become aware of it…use
those thoughts to remind you of our own partner…”think of your wife”
Dress in away that “helps” the situation…
Flee from it…1 Corinthians 6:18 “Have nothing to do with sex sins…”
Conclusion
The Bible says
Philippians 4:8 “Finally, my friends, keep your minds on whatever is true, pure, right,
holy, friendly, and proper. Don't ever stop thinking about what is truly
worthwhile and worthy of praise”
To finish I’d like you to draw a picture of the person that you have
feeling / thoughts for and you know you shouldn’t
In your mind I’d like you name that person…we’re going to ask God to help
us our thoughts and actions under control